We have all been there—at the beginning of a romantic relationship—where we are no longer within the bounds of earthly limits. Love is one of the strongest energies on earth. We are drawn to certain people like a moth to the light—and just as unconsciously as a moth too. We think we know why-because they are our soul mates or we believe we were “meant to be.” We stay up all night talking on the phone. We no longer need food. We know in that moment what Michael Jackson meant by Never Never Land. And we also know we never want to return to earth again without this feeling.
So how do we keep this magic alive? After hearing how hard it is to stay in this fairy tale world of love so often from my coaching clients, I suddenly realized we need instructions on how to stay in this state of intense sexy delight with the one we love.
- Stay being you, an individual. That very uniqueness is why they were attracted to you in the very beginning.
- Know that anger defines you and use it to guide you. Your specialness is what your partner is drawn to. Treasure this relationship enough to bring your whole self to it—anger and all. It will keep the flame blazing.
- Express anger to keep the relationship alive. Tell your lover when you are mad like this: “I am mad because______________”. Don’t let anger stack up and make you say things you don’t mean.
- When the anger is emptied out, return to love. This is easy to do if you really let it out. Let things explode every now and then—in this burst of energy—the sexiness will emerge again—as strong as it was in the beginning.
- Give up trying to please—it can ruin any chances you have to be sexy.
- Shout out from the rooftops what you want. Don’t cower in the fear of rejection or conflict.
- Love yourself above all, more than anyone or anything on this earth. No one will ever give you what you want unless you give it to yourself first.
- Never think you have to sacrifice you. It is not sexy.
- Good Sex is the result of Good Passion. Be passionate about life itself.
- Defend your lover against all. What we all really want is someone to be there for us. The sexist feeling on earth is to know someone loves you more than anyone else on this earth.
Follow the instructions above and keep your sexy romance for as long as you live on this earth!